I thought that I would start to share with you here tips from my new book “Kickin’ Butt as a Single Parent – 99 Tips That Every Single Parent Must Have”. Now when I mention every single parent I don’t mean “single” as in sole parent, I mean tips for every parent. If you like the tips then please let all of your fewllow bloggers know about this blog as well as your friends. I appreciate your support and hope that in some way these tips will bring value to you and your children.
It’s so easy to complain about our teens. I know I’m guilty of too often dishing out criticisms, admonishments, and lectures. I worry that my boys might be doing drugs, drinking, or some other peer-pressure stupidity. But, they also deserve my support when they do well and my understanding when they slip up.
My 16-year-old, Will, recently bounded into my office, eager to talk. Wisely, I pulled away from the hypnotic lure of my computer, and faced him squarely, ready for whatever followed.
Normally, when Will comes to talk to me, I am concerned that he either wants something or is going to confess something that I wish I didn’t have to hear. This time, I listened. And I listened and I listened. I smiled, I nodded, I grunted. But, mostly I listened. He had made a remarkable discovery! What was this remarkable revelation? “Life is complicated and full of wonder and amazing things. Where did life come from? Why do we sleep? How does our brain work? Why are there different languages and how did they evolve?” He literally rambled off these and other subjects, as if he’d just discovered the wheel! Continue reading »
When I was much younger I seemed to have a bit of a problem avoiding the other cars. I have scratched, dented, totaled and smashed more cars than a demolition derby driver. My dad would always say that if I was in Patton’s Tank Brigade we would have lost the war. It is only through the grace of God that I am still here today. The amazing thing to me is that I wrecked all of those cars while looking forward. OK, maybe once in awhile I wasn’t totally focused on looking forward but I can honestly promise you at no time was I ever driving the car through my rear view mirror.
It always bothers me when I talk to people that seem to be living life through their rear view mirror. You know the type. The guy who likes to say: “If only” or “Why not me”? They are living their life through their rear view mirror.
You know some of the best lesson’s we will ever learn are from our past mistakes. The error of the past is the wisdom and success of the future. Continue reading »
While on a recent vacation, my wife and I had a stimulating discussion with friends about friends. We were enjoying a meal with two other couples and one of the men asked the question, “Have you found many couples that you are friends with and, if so, how have you met them?”
What followed was a spirited discussion about friends–same sex friends, friends as couples, and opposite sex friends, when you’re married (or monogamously involved). The conclusion was that it is not simple.
As we were on a trip hosted by Dennis Prager (radio talk-show host, writer, and lecturer), I found myself immediately paraphrasing him because he’s often discussed this issue. He said that for two couples to be friends, a number of relationships have to be in place. Each man must like the other man; each woman must like the other woman, and the same for the opposite gender in each couple. If any one of those relationships doesn’t work, the friendship of the two couples is in jeopardy. Continue reading »
Sometimes, life brings us a lot of lessons at once. In my family, we’ve gotten our share of them recently and they’ve added dimension to our lives and allowed us to each grow in different ways, without necessarily providing a neat and regular narrative for my column. That hasn’t stopped me yet and I think you’ll find they all coalesce into something meaningful.
Let’s begin with my older son growing as a rock ‘n’ roller, a talented drummer, guitarist, and vocalist. His passion carried over to an extraordinary opportunity of a lifetime when he got to jam with his idol, Chris Cornell (Soundgarden and Audioslave) at The Roxy Theatre, on Sunset Blvd., in Hollywood. The full story and video are here, but suffice it to say, I became a sort of “stage dad” along the way.
I was extremely proud of his growth though I wasn’t actually present when he took the initiative to reach out to Chris Cornell by calling out and asking to jam with him. Frankly, the tickets were too expensive for me. But, after the fact, I used my recently acquired social media skills and “relationships” (are they really my “friends?”) to help disseminate the story on various web-sites, my column outlets, distributing the YouTube video, and promoting this opportunity for him. Continue reading »
A recent Pew Research Center study called “Women, Men and the New Economics of Marriage (Jan. 19, 2010 by Richard Fry and D’Vera Cohn) revealed that women are making much more money, over the recent past, than at any other time in our history. The study had the following opening: “The institution of marriage has undergone significant changes in recent decades as women have outpaced men in education and earnings growth. These unequal gains have been accompanied by gender role reversals in both the spousal characteristics and the economic benefits of marriage.”
It makes total sense given the changing values and trends in our society and the increasing number of women attending college, now outnumbering men significantly. But, the social impact of these changes might be troubling. As part of the generation that is both responsible for and feeling these transformations the most, I have mixed feelings about this brave new world.
Further conclusions from this report were that “A larger share of men in 2007, compared with their 1970 counterparts, are married to women whose education and income exceed their own…A larger share of women are married to men with less education and income.” What does all this mean for our children who are growing up in this changing environment? I’m not sure and I can only make some generalities from my own perspective. Continue reading »
My son and I had an extraordinary experience this Spring Break while on a ski trip at Mammoth, California. It was just the two of us, since my wife stayed home for work and my older son preferred hanging out with his friends and girlfriend (I can’t blame him, as she’s wonderful). So, it was a special alone-time-trip with my younger son, David.
Because our skiing levels and skiing interests are quite different, we tend to prefer to ski separately. I have friends there and David had some friends from school that he skied with. However, we always hook up at some point and one day, after he’d slightly hurt himself and was taking it easy, we skied together. We skied just one area, where there’s a short chair lift and short runs. Continue reading »