Look at these two sweet girls.  This was taken a few years ago.  It looks like the cover of a postcard, right?  No one would ever suspect that there are times, on rare occasions, when we are near WWIII in our home. 

Although I have liberty to write about anything I choose here (thanks, Bill), I write about parenting more often than not.  Perhaps it is because parenting is the one subject for which I am asked the most questions.  Perhaps it is because it is the season of life for which I find myself immersed, right now.  Either way, I know it is a subject that none of us truly ever perfect, but I’ll share a few thoughts here on what I am learning along the way.

- The response, “Because I said so….” is NOT effective parenting.  This just doesn’t cut it, parents.  I know. I know.  This is what our parents always said and their parents before them.  However, if our primary job is to teach our kids, what are we teaching them with that phrase?  Nothing? Or maybe that one day they will be able to boss around their kids, but until then “just do as I say.”?  Be honest with your children and just tell them why you said what you said.  It alleviates the rebellion that some kids feel when they aren’t effective explained the why’s and how’s. Continue reading »

 

We have all heard the saying, “Don’t make a mountain out of a mole hill.” But, do we effectively integrate that into our parenting styles?

In my perfectionist, OCD, gotta-have-everything-organized world, it seems that I often miss the mark. 

-I am often obsessing over the bed being made correctly versus lying in it with my daughter have a “girl” chat.  Continue reading »

 

Today’s post is a simple litmus test on your parenting.  I have discovered than in my busiest times of life, I must frequently evaluate my priorities.  Raising children is a season of life, a brief moment of time that will quickly end, and I don’t want to look back on the coulda, shoulda, woulda’s of child-rearing.  Here are some questions I ask myself that may also be helpful to you:

#1) How much quality time am I spending with my children?  (Note: I said quality time.)

#2) Am I too busy for my kids? Continue reading »

 

Single parents, married parents, soon-to-be parents, listen up. I think, pray, and really consider what I will share with you from week to week.  This one, you must hear!  I want to dedicate this post to some good old-fashioned kick-in-the-pants parenting advice.

Stop overindulging your children!

I cannot begin to express how I hope that this message flies from one end of the earth to the other.  What a waste of young, precious life, when we, as parents, are too lazy to do our job that we simply overindulge our child’s every desire.  I do not care if you have toddlers, pre-teens, teens, or adult children.  Stop this.   Continue reading »

 

Parenting is difficult.  Period.  You can read every book and implement every rule your parents swore to you would work and you will still have questions!  As wonderful as my kids are turning out, I can tell you there have been dark days, when I was frustrated, hurt, angry, and concerned that I had not made good parenting choices.  Any parent who is being honest would say the same.  So, if even the most seasoned parents admit to struggling, how is it that we do this thing successfully? 

Well, first, there are several things that are what I considered to be “negotiables” in your parenting style, e.g. to spank or not spank, bedtimes, allowances, etc.  However, I believe there are also some “non-negotiables”, some of which you have read here at Single Parents Town, so feel free to view some of my other parenting blog post at http://www.singleparentstown.com/blog/author/jennifer/.

DISCIPLINE: Continue reading »

 

     Proverbs 31:27-28 “She carefully watches everything in her household and suffers nothing to laziness.  Her children stand and bless her.”  As parents, I think we all have that deep desire that as our children become adults, they will stand and recognize all the sacrifices we made, the rules we implemented, and bless us for it.  They will be proud of how we raised them.  We hope to see the fruits of our labor.

     I read the above passage recently for probably the 100th time and something stood out to me that had never stood out before.  We tend to cling to “her children stand and bless her” because that is the result.  But………….what are the four words prior to it?   ”…SUFFERS NOTHING TO LAZINESS.”

     It is not by accident that the words are placed strategically there.  Parenting is work — simple as that, even if you have a two-parent home, but certainly when you are a single parent.  It requires intention and planning.   This is when children feel secure — no matter their age.  Too often, with the weight of financial planning, emotional stresses, and exhaustion, we simply “give in” and do not effectively parent.  We lose structure, because we are too tired to implement it.   I know I have been guilty. Continue reading »