So You Think You Are A Single Parent Huh?

 Posted by Bill on November 28, 2011  General, Raising Children as a Single Parent  3 Responses »
Nov 282011
 

I often get calls and emails from people, who are married, telling me that they are just like a single parent. Or in other words, that they are just like me. That they do all the household work, that they care for the kids, that they pay the bills, that they manage everyone’s schedules, that they feel as if the world is on their shoulders, that they are just like a single parent or again, that they are just like me. I always bite my tongue and listen, because although they believe to know what my life is like, in reality they are not, just like a single parent. You may be an enabler but you are NOT just like a single parent. You either are, or you are not, a single parent. You can not be half pregnant, you can not be half alive, and you definitely can not be a single parent, unless you are one.

I often say that I love being a single dad but in reality that is probably not true. I love being a dad, I love raising my children and I love being there for them but it sure would be easier if I had a little help every now and then. Not just help with making meals, or getting the kids places, but emotional help, the mental help, the financial help, and the support that I myself so often need. You see, for all of you that think you are just like a single parent, you still have someone coming home to the family at night. Someone who is there to listen to your problems, someone who can provide another perspective on how to best raise the kids, someone to deal with their issues, someone to help with the carpools, the sporting events and the stress of just being a parent.

We single parents, more time than not, don’t have this. Oh I am sure that in many cases the other non custodial parent does their part. After all I am speaking to both of you here, but has that always worked out for you the way you planned it? Married couples do have this. We single parents are left to go it alone 24/7 not just from 8 to 5 each day. Continue reading »

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Are You Looking For Your Children?

 Posted by Bill on November 14, 2011  General  No Responses »
Nov 142011
 

Have you ever heard the story about the little boy who answered the phone call?

One day, the phone rang, and the little boy answered.
“May I speak to your parents?”
“They’re busy.”
“Oh. Is anybody else there?”
“The police.”
“Can I speak to them?”
“They’re busy.”
“Oh. Is anybody else there?”
“The firemen.”
“Can I speak to them?”
“They’re busy.”

“So let me get this straight — your parents, the police, and the firemen are there, but they’re all busy? What are they doing?”

“Lookin for me.” Continue reading »

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My Kids Are Like The Stock Market…

 Posted by Bill on November 7, 2011  Balancing Work and Children, Raising Children as a Single Parent, The Craziness of Single Parenting  2 Responses »
Nov 072011
 

I have decided to change my kid’s names from Jack and Michaela to Dow and NASDAQ. Why you ask? It’s because I believe that raising them is like investing in the stock market. As long as I put something into them each month, I am bound to get a good return on my investment. At least that’s what the experts tell me. Recently I have found that my success with the kids has been similar to my recent returns in the stock market. Dismal! I have scratched my head, reviewed my parental investing strategy and made some adjustments. But still I am not seeing the returns that I had hoped for. I keep telling myself that’s its not how I start but how I finish. This would make sense if I was a marathon runner, but as a single dad I am a sprinter. I sprint from school event to sporting event, from grocery store to doctor’s appointments, from homework assignments to dinners. I want to see a return NOW!

My financial planner tells me to have patience. Follow the plan, and that all things are difficult before they are easy. Easy for him to say, he’s getting paid monthly on what I invest with him. I want to see a return NOW!

I know that I am not the only single parent that wants a return on his investment NOW. Why does this have to be so difficult? You give, you love, you encourage, you discipline and you lead, but still I am not seeing the results. I want a return NOW! Continue reading »

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I Hope That You Don’t Forget What You Already Know.

 Posted by Bill on October 10, 2011  General, The Craziness of Single Parenting  2 Responses »
Oct 102011
 

I am blessed to have here at www.singleparentstown.com the greatest single parent bloggers in the world. Michele, Jennifer, Davis, Michael and Roxy are amazing single parents who each and every week share their stories with you in such a way, that it makes you feel like they speaking to you one on one. They have all been through so much as a parent. Many of them, me included, have lost a spouse to death or addiction. Some have experienced homelessness, abandonment and poverty. Some have remarried and some have re-divorced. Some have found God to be their ultimate source of strength and some have found their experiences to be their source of life. The number one thing that I love about each of them is that they speak from experience, they speak from their hearts and they share easy and concise stories and tips that make a difference in so many people’s lives.

What also impresses me about our bloggers is that the stories and tips they share are things that more times than not, we already know. I thought that today I would share with you some insight about things that I am sure you, already know. My hope is that by reminding you what you already know, that you will be able to put to use these things so that not only your life, but the lives of your family, will be the better because of it. After reading my thoughts below, I would be honored if you would add to the list by commenting. That way all who read this blog will be better because of what you have brought to their attention about what they already know.

Continue reading »

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My Son Taught Me Something That He Wish’s He Hadn’t

 Posted by Bill on October 3, 2011  General, Getting Your New Life In Order, How to Communicate with Your Kids, Raising Children as a Single Parent  1 Response »
Oct 032011
 

Over the years I have learned so much from my children. I have learned how to smile when I was feeling sad, I have learned how to be patient when I was feeling anxious, I have learned how to juggle when both hands were tied behind my back, I have learned how to do three loads of laundry before most people are even awake and I have learned what unconditional love is. Of all the lessons my children have taught me, I think the best one that I have ever learned was taught to me by my son Jack late last August. 

One day Jack and I were having one of our Dad versus seventeen year old son difference of opinion conversations. Ok it was an argument about what I expected of Jack and what he expected of me. As I threatened once again to take a way his cell phone, he responded by saying to me “Go ahead Dad, your hollow promises don’t mean anything to me.” As I started to get more upset with him I stopped in my tracks and thought hold it, he thinks that my threats are hollow huh? 

Now in my own defense, I am not the type of Dad who says one thing and does the other, it’s just that I don’t always follow through with my punishments until the end, 100% of the time. I would like to think that I follow through at least 90% of the time, but my daughter would put that number somewhere around 70% and obviously based upon Jack’s comments, he would put it somewhere around 10% of the time. Continue reading »

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Are You A Single Parent Because Of Abuse?

 Posted by Bill on August 21, 2011  Balancing Work and Children, Dealing with Divorce and Your Ex, General, Raising Children as a Single Parent, The Craziness of Single Parenting  3 Responses »
Aug 212011
 

“Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.”

I was recently asked to write an article about becoming a single parent due to addiction or abuse. I guess that sometimes I forget that so many of us become single parents, not because we chose to and not because our marriage just didn’t work out, but because of addictions and abuse. Since I fall into the first category, single due to an addiction, I thought that I would try and understand what it truly means to become a single parent due to abuse.

Although I have lived this life, I still wanted to make sure that I had my basis and facts covered. The first thing that I did was go to the Internets all knowing dictionary, Wikipedia. Each time I go there I have the benefit viewing a page or two of relative information. Not much, but enough to get me up to speed on what it is I am trying to understand. This week I looked up the word “Abuse”. OMG (That’s text for those of you who don’t have teenagers which means OH MY GOD) There was page, after page, after page of definitions. Child abuse, dating abuse, addiction abuse, abuse of power and the big one domestic abuse. The definition ofdomestic abuse is described below: Continue reading »

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A Parents Job Description…

 Posted by Bill on June 20, 2011  Balancing Work and Children, Dealing with Divorce and Your Ex, General, Getting Your New Life In Order, Raising Children as a Single Parent, Teenagers, The Craziness of Single Parenting, Uncategorized  No Responses »
Jun 202011
 

Since it is Monday and the new week is upon us, I thought that I would share with you a job description that a friend of mine recently shared with me. I have posted this blog once before but believe that it it is worth repeating. I hope that it brings a smile to your face and starts your weekend off on the right foot. It is hilarious and something we can all relate to.

POSITION:

Mom, Mommy, Mama, Ma Continue reading »

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