Jennifer

Jennifer Maggio is considered one of the nation's leading experts on single parent issues. She is a sought-after speaker and critically-acclaimed author who has appeared on more than 100 radio & television shows. She is founder of the national nonprofit, The Life of a Single Mom Ministries. She has written for dozens of magazines and is currently a columnist for Single Parents Town, BizyMoms, and Halo Magazine. For more information, visit www.jennifermaggio.com .

 

This is my absolute favorite time of year!  It is.  I have hardly been able to wait to put the Christmas tree up and listen to Christmas music (which I haven’t done yet).   I love driving around looking at Christmas lights with my family.  I love the colder weather.  I love giving presents to my kids. 

At this time of year, it is pretty common to begin to hear more about thankfulness.  Some of us go around the Thanksgiving table and share one thing we are thankful for.  Others write lists of those things.  We mention things, such as family and friends and possessions.

 I recently shared some thoughts about the holiday season with my single moms group that I work with; and yesterday at church, I heard one of the best sermons on thankfulness that I’ve heard in a while.  The thoughts were similar, so I thought I’d combine them and and share a few here. Continue reading »

 

(Proceed with caution. This one may hurt a bit.)

If I had to choose one area that has been an on-going struggle with me (not that there haven’t been many), this would be it.  I have strong convictions and am very opinionated.  I believe there may be one or two of you out there like me, so I offer you my thoughts.

Years ago, as I’ve mentioned, I found myself a homeless unwed teen mom who eventually landed a corporate job for a major Fortune 500 company.  I gained a great deal of knowledge and experience within that company.  I developed my public speaking skills and organization skills.  I made a great living for my family.  I enjoyed lavish vacations.  My confidence grew. 

But something else began to happen.  The larger my success, the bigger my ego grew!  With increased confidence came increased arrogance and a total lack of humility.  If a supervisor tried to give me direction, I became defensive.  If an employee didn’t agree with me, I ruled with an iron fist and brought the hammer down!  Continue reading »

 

We’re on a journey together, you and I.  Life is all about the journey.  Today, as I thought about what to write, through tears,  I realized that today’s post would just have to be about my journey, about where I am, right now.  I couldn’t give today— no advice, no wisdom, no wit.  Not today……. Albeit random, here goes.

Today is filled with great emotion for me.  As you read this, I am in attendance at yet a 5th funeral in 5 weeks!  It’s unheard of.  Five people that I know personally– that I had relationships with, friends, family  – have gone on to be with the Lord.  I wrote about two of those deaths  ”Are You Living a Life Worth Celebrating?” at http://www.singleparentstown.com/blog/2010/10/13/jennifer/are-you-living-a-life-worth-celebrating/.

The most recent passing, last Sunday, of a 22-year-old who was killed at our church Sunday morning, has been so traumatic, so hard.  Yet, his life truly was a life worth celebrating.  Read about Jordan at  http://www.wafb.com/Global/story.asp?S=13459299. Continue reading »

 

I know — the title got ya!  Well, for my 5 or 6 highly-refined, cultured readers, I must caution you.  You probably won’t have a clue where I’m going with this.  For the rest of you, enjoy!

As I travel and speak in different venues, I try to be very open and real with my audience.  Therefore, my stories are usually pretty uninhibited.  I am reminded this morning of one story in particular.

As I’ve shared often now, I didn’t come from money or refinement.  I wasn’t in Charm School learning how to cross my legs and smile ever-so-slightly, as my Southern gentleman swept me off my feet.  Quite the opposite. I grew up on a farm with dirt between my toes, picking peas and corn, and driving tractors.  My dad married a total of six times, and there was always drama! It wasn’t uncommon to hear of adult women at a basketball game duking it out or two high school girls cat-fighting over a boy.  In fact, in high school, I witnessed two girls getting stabbed, a gang fight breaking out, and a classmate getting his head pounded open, later needing stitches.  That was my life.  (Just wait……………………I’m going somewhere with this.) Continue reading »

 

Since I’m writing to a group of single parents, I figured we needed to go ahead and put this one out there – OFFENSE.  Man, oh man, how I sprint to avoid bitter and offended folks!  Let me give you a news flash.  Your hurt, your offense, your bitterness, your unforgivness does nothing to THEIR lives.  It does not hurt your ex-mother-in-law, your ex-husband, or your ex-boyfriend.  In fact, they’ve probably forgotten what they did to offend you in the first place.

In having counseled literally hundreds of single moms, I can tell you that I have never sat with one mom who didn’t have a reason to be angry or hurt – not one.  They all have a story.  We all have a story. 

I was astonished to recently stumble upon a single parent’s site that promoted “Tell-us-why-you-hate-your-baby’s-daddy Day”.  Are you kidding me?!  Am I the only one that sees the insanity in this?!  What do you hope to accomplish?  So…………..we paint little George’s daddy as a complete loser for not paying you child support or for beating you or whatever (albeit horrible things), then………. what?  Who does it hurt?  Let me answer this for you.  YOU.  It hurts you.  For every time you relive the pain and revisit the conversations or the events that devastated you, you live in that moment.   It’s amazing that we sometimes cannot remember where we parked after a 15-minute grocery trip to Walmart, but we can remember for the next 15 years the exact conversation where someone offended us! Continue reading »

 

If you would’ve told me 15 years ago that I was going to be a successful author, speaker, and mother of three kids, AND BE HAPPILY MARRIED………I would’ve laughed in your face.  Isn’t it funny how life comes full circle and all those bumpy roads that you traveled before somehow seem worth it?  They make you who you are today.

Let’s rewind 15 years for a moment, shall we?   I was 18 years old and had just given birth to my first child.  I was homeless and helpless.  A few months later, I found myself living on government assistance and in government housing.  I was making $6.00/hour to make ends meet and support my son.  We had no furniture, only a few clothes, little food, and it was pitiful!

I had just spent the first 18 years of my life in an underground hell.  My mother was killed unexpectedly when I was a small child, so I was raised by my alcoholic father who married a total of 6 times.  The marriages didn’t include all the girlfriends and mistresses.  My home was a mess.  I started being molested at 3 years old, and for 9 years I suffered horrific acts at the hands of multiple perpetrators.   Through the years, I was beaten, choked, malnourished, forced to steal, and force to view pornography — never breathing a word of any of this to another living soul.   Desperate for attention, I started having sex at 13 and found myself pregnant twice in high school (having miscarriages both times).  By the third pregnancy my senior year, I was a walking time bomb.  This is where I found myself 15 years ago.  Continue reading »

 

      I have hundreds of topics to share about and many stories already lined out for this blog. I want to talk about the hard things of single parenting, the fun times of raising children, the excitement of falling in love, but…………I’ve decided to take a different direction today.

Our family has suffered tremendous loss this week.  My husband’s grandfather passed away at 86 years old, having been married to his wife for 60+ years, served in WWII, and fathered 3 children.  He lived a full life and died surrounded with family and friends. 

Our church family lost an awesome man of God, Dave Ohlerking (pictured above).  Dave was 70 years old, married to a wonderful woman, and the founder of Children’s Cup Ministries, one of the most influential organizations in the country in African missions.  He and his organization have literally worked with thousands of people through the years, bringing them food, clothes, and friendship.  Continue reading »