Single Parents Town Blog

I saw this video clip and like so many other things it inspired me to write my article for this week. There are so many topics that I want to write about and quite honestly cannot wait to share my thoughts each week with the hope that my thoughts and words will touch someone or make a difference in some small way. This video touched on what I believe to be a very important word – FAILURE. Failure is a word that can mean many different things and it can mean different things to different people but in the end  failure is something that most people fear.

We are born in a state of perfection if you will and in those first moments of life and for days to come we are flawless, adored, loved and in the eyes of most, perfect in what is an imperfect world. In those early days and even months of life we do not know the word failure, do not fear it and have no perception of what it means. We begin life feeling invincible and believing that there is nothing we cannot do or achieve. There is no such thing as failure.

Somewhere along the way, life steps in and we begin to lose ourselves to the outside world. Everything that we are and believe ourselves to be starts to become defined by everything and everyone outside of our own hearts and minds. Identities shift, roles change and we start to question our own beliefs, values and dreams. Self esteem falls, confidence is shaken and at times people sell their souls just to fit in or to feel loved and accepted. In short, we begin to doubt who we are and what we are truly capable of. The world teaches us that failure is negative and something bad. Failure at one thing can leave someone feeling like they have failed at life and can set off a downward spiral. Continue reading »

My Beautiful Friend,

We just finished a long conversation but I felt like I needed to say more.

Let me tell you what I see…

You are a beautiful woman who after taking a stand some time ago to make her life better is thinking twice because she is without a man right now. It is something so many of us women struggle with…needing a man’s attention and validation. Being a single woman is like a curse, so it seems. As I sat and listened to you question everything about yourself, I thought it might be good to remind you of where you have been and what you have accomplished.

You are a wonderful daughter and sister. You came from a family where everyone took care of each other and from parents who lived and died by their children. They worked hard to give you all the best. You have a wonderful relationship with them. They love you!  You have not let them down because you are divorced. Continue reading »

The topic of forgiveness continues to be a hot one and it is a topic that I know well. Forgiveness is never easy and while I, like everyone else, have had to learn to forgive others my struggles with forgiveness are much harder when it comes to forgiving myself. I do not have all of the answers to this complex but very common challenge but there is one thing I know for sure: an inability to forgive oneself can and will sabotage many areas of your life standing in the way of living the life you so badly crave.

I have written about this before and I will write about it again. It is a topic that I am passionate about in part because of my own struggles and in part because I have talked with so many people who struggle with the same. The inability to forgive ourselves and others holds a fate that in many cases does not have a good outcome and the negativity that can come with it often times spills over into our lives saturating it with a toxic waste that is hard to ignore and hard to escape.

We are all human and even though we may aspire to be perfect the reality is that we are not. We live in an imperfect world and unfortunately, humans make mistakes and sometimes those mistakes can hurt others and in the process we often hurt ourselves. Sometimes we make the same mistakes and even though we know at some level that our behaviors are wrong we continue to do them anyways and regardless of the consequences. This can be self-defeating and the question is no longer what but more importantly why. Why do we engage in behaviors that hurt others, hurt ourselves or leave our lives in a mess? Continue reading »