Seriously being a DAD was the worst decision of my life. How could I be so dumb? How could I have not seen it coming? How did I ever get myself into this? Being a DAD was the worst decision of my life! There were so many other paths I could have chosen. There were so many other decisions I could have made and should have made. What was I thinking? Obviously my attitude about it failed me, obviously my decision making was skewed, why was I in denial when I had always seemed to of made good decisions in the past? Being a DAD was the worst decision of my life.
Prior to being a DAD my life was great. My business was booming, my relationships were phenomenal, my attitude was authentic, my outlook was positive, my life was darn near perfect, and then it happened, I became a DAD. What made it worst is that I have become a DAD more than once in my life. You would think that after becoming a DAD once I would have learned, but no, not me, I had to become a DAD again. What was I thinking? I knew that I hated being a DAD but I did it again. As I look back on my life I wish more than anything else I had never ever become a DAD. Being a DAD was the worst thing that I ever did.
Now before you all start worrying about my children let me explain to you what being a DAD is all about. Here you go… First being a DAD has nothing to do with being a parent, a father or a hero to your kids. Being a DAD is a state of mind that each and every one of us has fallen into at one time or another in our lives. It is a state of mind that will affect you like nothing before. It is a state of mind that will cause you pain and anger. It is a state of mind that will bring you unhappiness for the rest of your life if you stay in it. Each and eveytime I have become a DAD (and yes I have done it more than once) I have suffered the consequences. The good news is I am going to let you know what it is, so that you don’t make the same mistakes, so that you can live a happy life, a life filled with enlightenment, success and hope. Are you ready for the secret?
Well here it is…DAD is actually my acronym for the following:
D stands for Denial. Denial is a natural emotion that allows you to put aside things that happen in your life until your mind can grasp and understand them. Denial is a very warming feeling and is actually good for you for a short period of time, but unfortunately if you allow denial to become part of your makeup on an ongoing basis, it will eventually rear its ugly head and slam you into the ground. We have all been there at one time or another. We deny that are finances are unraveling before us so we continue to go about life as if sooner or later we will win the lotto, only to wake up one day broke and destitute. We deny that are relationships are falling apart believing that they will get better if we just put our head into the sand a pray that all will all be ok. We are in denial because our mind can not yet grasp the severity of the pain we are feeling.
A stands for Attitude. So often we all fail to maintain an authentic attitude. Let me give you an example. How often do you ask someone you see how life is going and they say “terrible”? Very rarely I’ll bet. Everyone always says “great” even when they know that their lives are a mess. They fail to be authentic in their thinking about their attitude. They continue to be in denial. They are afraid to be honest because they are afraid of what others might think. They are in Denial. You can not begin to change your life, your situation or your problems until you embrace an authentic attitude regardless of what others think.
D stands for Decisions. So often in life we all want to be perceived as right, as perfect as without fault, and once we do this we begin to make ego based Decisions. Our decisions are based upon how we want people to see us, as opposed to decisions that are right for us. Decisions that are based upon a world of denial, or based upon a non-authentic attitude, are decisions that are destine to fail. What’s worst again is that these decisions can have far reaching consequences that in some cases can not be reversed.
I have on more than one occasion in life learned the hard way that each and every time I was in Denial, maintained an Attitude that was not authentic, or made Decisions that were ego based, my life would take a turn for the worst. I have also learned, on more than one occasion that I, and only I, have the ability the means and the understanding to change this for the best.
I wanted to share this with you because I truly believe if you live your life Denial free, with and Attitude that is authentic, and you make Decisions that are right for you and your situation, not for your ego, your will find joy in the darkness, happiness in the sad times and hope where you once only thought despair lives. You have the right to be happy, you have the opportunity to make your life what you want it and hopefully now you have the knowledge now to make it so.
Bill McLeod is the founder of www.singleparentstown.com The author of “Kickin Butt as a Single Parent – 99 Tips That Every Single Parent Must Have” and a Life Coach to Single Parentswww.billmcleodcoaching.com . He can be reached at bill@singleparentstown.comYou can also follow Bill on Facebook and Twitter under Bill McLeod
