May 202011


As Oprah winds down her final season of the Oprah Winfrey show I have tuned in to catch the last week of shows. Yesterday she had on her most memorable guests from the last 25 years, including two refugees from Rwanda and also a courageous woman who while dying of cancer recorded hours and hours of video with lessons for her then small daughter to grow up with. Here message: Live in the now. The present is all we know we have for sure.

Also on the show was one of my favorite Oprah guests: M. Gary Neuman. I have written about him here before. He is the author of numerous books, including Divorce the Sandcastle Way and Connect to Love. Neuman sat down again with a single father and two children whose mother had left them. The children shared their pain and Oprah said they were most memorable because they mirrored what many children in America feel. The show highligheted the fact that while many people say “children are resilient” and ”they will be okay” parents and other loving members of the extended family must continue to reach out and listen to the children and help ease their pain.

Neuman’s main message from the show We can’t control the other parent, we can only control ourselves. One loving parent is enough to listen and show a child the way to a life of love and contentment.

It is a message of action and of hope. This is a message that needs to be put out there more and one as single parents we need to keep a focus on. This alone teaches our children that the action of today–listening, connecting,  being there, and doing our best with what we have at any given moment–is the positive path to take.

Thanks Dr. Neuman and thanks Oprah for 25 great seasons of shows.

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