Be Here Now

The other day I drove to a local farm and purchased fresh white peaches at the delicate peak of ripeness. I came home and I made peach pan cakes.

Promptly my youngest son refused to eat them.  (I did make plain ones, too, but asked him to try the peach ones.) He refused though the specks of peaches would have been barely recognizably under an electron microscope.

 Sigh.

I did not freak out, whine or be the martyr mother (as was my first instinct). Instead I sat down and enjoyed my breakfast. As they chattered I ate in silence and thought about something I have been reading quite a lot about: staying present. Just recently I read on Katrina Kenison’s blog that she tries to “be here now.” This is not a new concept to me, but it is one I need to hear and apply more often. I got it to mean don’t get ahead of yourself (which I often do.)

 So in my silent state of pancake eating, I broke the message down as it related to this situation.

Fact:  My son did not want to eat the peach pancakes. Period.

This did not mean:

• That he would never eat them in his entire life.
• He would never try new things.
• He would forever be deficient in his daily allowance of fruits and vegetables.

It also did not mean:

• He did not love me.
• He did not appreciate my effort. (Okay, this one is really difficult for me because of all the time it takes in purchasing good food and preparing it.)

After the meal, he remembered to clear his plate (no small victory despite his advanced age of 10!) and thanked me for the meal. (I think my silence was a tip off to him).

I wasn’t angry per se, as much as I was exasperated. Yet, staying in the now made the problem –he did not want to eat the pancakes—much smaller than lumping a lifetime of worry and ancillary issues into the mix.

Also I enjoyed my meal more.

Be here now. Yes. It is a lesson I will have to practice over and over again.

Sigh.